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Dubleott's Rules for Online Dating

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Ok, I'm probably going to get into trouble for writing this but I think it is something that needs to be out there so we can get through this quagmire called Online Dating.


  Guys, when you meet a lady on a dating site and you've both made a "connection" keep your ex-wives, dead wives and old girlfriends out of the dating game.  It's hard enough for the ladies on here to find a great guy without having to compete with someone from your past (or present).  Not all of us are strong enough or secure enough to handle a three way. 




  Ladies, when you meet a guy on a dating site and you really want to get to know him better don't go crying your eyes out about your rent, your late car payment or your dead end job...  Men don't come on these sites to find someone to take all your troubles away. 


  Also, when you do end up talking about your ex, Ladies, don't call him a dead beat for not keeping up with the alimony payments, it makes you sound like you have an axe to grind and you're always broke.  Get a job and pull some of your own weight, that will impower you and you will appear more attractive to the opposite sex. 

  Men when you talk of your ex, be very careful, we are listening to every word you are saying and how you are saying it.  If you get that wistful far away look in your eye we will see that.  Either be prepared for a whack upside your head or our silence.  Either way, you lose.  We got along this far without you...

  Ladies, let's be honest, we are not going to find our Mr. Darcy inside a computer.  He was the figment of one woman's imagination over 200 years ago and written by a woman for women and then beautifully fleshed out in a movie.  Some of these ole boys are gonna be too tired at the end of the day to pick you up and carry you to the bedroom.  (That one's for you Doc)  :)


  And Guy's, cut us some slack too, after all some of us work just as hard as you do and we can't be expected to be at our sweetest all the time.  We still have our "fat" days, our blue days and our "just leave me alone" days.  That doesn't mean we don't want you to call, we do, we like it when you can put a smile on our face just by hearing your voice on the other end.  And if you listen real close, you will hear us smiling when we answer the phone. 

to be continued...





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Love your thoughts and wish for a simpler time.
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1 year ago

Hi DoubleOtt, that is some big shoes to fill. I guess there isn't that much activity on this sight. However, it always comes out the same. The gentlemen meet and greet but compare us to the others. How is anyone going to get to know a person in three dates? But I do get that attraction there has to be something. The men should just man up and say, I am not feeling it. 


I don't really have that I am not feeling it problem. I seem to have that I like to keep you hanging on. I guess I just need to cut the strings instantly. 


Here is a toast to you and I, enjoying life and living it. 


Take care, smart lady, your prince will come along some day. 

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Ok folks, so I have come to the realization that online dating DOES NOT WORK...for me at least.   Guys, I'm not your ex that took you for hundreds of thousands of dollars, nor am I the one that gave you Herpes.  I'm also not the woman that left you after your prostate surgery.  Shees, some guys are more damaged than anybody I have ever met!  I cannot phathom why such damaged people go on these dating sites "looking for the one" when they all run like hell for the hills...  Don't get me wrong, I have been on the ride and ended up on the ground because he "wasn't that into me" ... fine, get up, move on, but if you are "kind, funny, honest, caring, blah, blah, blah... at least have the decency to return an email for cryin' out loud!!

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An update to Dubleott's Rules for Online Dating:


  I just had the most sh#tty day.


  Well it all started a few weeks ago when I got a call from one of my most beloved clients.  She asked me if I would be interested in meeting a nice cowboy she'd met through a mutual friend (not MY mutual friend)  so I said "Sure, what the heck, give him my number" .  So a couple of weeks later I get a text message from an unknown number and it's this cowboy, introducing himself.  So I call him back ( I didn't have a text plan) and we talk for a little bit and he says he'll call me later.  Ok, fine... 

  Several days later I get a text would I like to meet him for dinner.  Ok.  We discuss locations that would allow us to meet half way and settle on a little restaurant/casion on the outskirts of town... IT WENT GREAT...  we ended up closing the place down and after went our seperate ways.  Days go by, texts are sent,( by now I have a text plan) would I like to go to a hot spring?  Yeah, what the heck...   we take a bottle of wine, and the conversation flowed again.   GREAT... then I saw something in his eye, just for a split second...  what was that?  ah, it was just my imagination.  We again, go our seperate ways.  A few days later he invites my to his place for dinner.  Again great conversation over a crock pot roast and a bottle of wine.   We pet, we kiss, we cuddl...  it's nice, I'm thinking "Ok , I ccould get used to this" ...  I leave, and then for the next week CRICKETS.  I text a nudge, "Was it something I said?"  CRICKETS 


  A few days later I go to work on my most beloved clients horses ( the one who set this up) and we get to talking ( as girls do) and I find out that the cowboy is still infatuated with her mutual friend ...  I spent the rest of that day marinating on the information I had received and the more I thought about it, the more pissed I got. 


  Guys, WHY can't you just be honest and up front about things BEFORE you set the hook?  Why even show a gal a good time if your head's not in the game and you, knowing full well that it's not going anywhere anyhow because your unrequited affections for another aren't acknowleged, have a compulsion to hurt an innocent person.  

  It was a real sh#tty day.   



  Update to: A Most Sh#tty Day


  After a week of silence, word comes by way of an email.  (Don't ya just love that?)  There were no romantic feelings for his part and he didn't know how to not hurt me with that revelation.  I'm a big girl I can take quite a bit and that didn't  even sting LOL !!  I am gonna miss that hot spring, though.  :)


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Concolor, Mr Darcy would be the love/hate interest of a Miss Elizabeth Bennett  in Pride & Prejudice...(watch the movie instead of reading the book :) ) 

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Who the heck is Mr. Darcy.  Great comments by the way.  Pete

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I have a bench seat in my truck. I love it, Ill have to find myself a nice lil lady so I can put my arm around her shoulders though. I miss those carefree days!

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Just wanted to say that I loved your post!  

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OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH, How I remember. You are soooooo right but to finish that thought would you please get rid of that --- Damn boom box you got in those cars. What happened to conversation I can hear that thing a mile away. No wonder that woman left your A__. Thanks for listening.

Jack :-)

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                                               BENCH SEATS


  How many of you can remember the bench seats in all the older cars and trucks?  I miss them.  I mean, when there were still bench seats in the vehicles couples were closer to each other then.  The guy always drove and his lady sat right beside him and he would put his arm around her shoulder and they would talk about all sorts of things from the mundane to the important stuff like which movie to go see...  And they were never in a hurry to get anywhere because they liked being next to each other, holding hands and enjoying the ride.  And if one of their friends was along for the ride, that squeezed them together even closer. :)  


   Nowadays, all the cars and trucks have bucket seats that seperate us with arm rests, cup holders and consoles.  Not a great invention if you think about it.  Folks are in more of a hurry now that nobody is sitting right there beside them.  More stress is added to the driver and wrecks are a common occurrence now that we've been driven apart by plastic conviences. 


  Studies have shown that human contact relieves stress, lowers blood pressure and promotes a sense of general happiness, so what were the designers in the auto industry thinking when they put in isolating bucket seats in cars and trucks, did they envision the consequences of such an invention?  I don't think so.  We are driving faster, we are more stressed, and we have created our own little world inside of our cars and trucks that isolate us from the outside world.  We have more crashes, are more distracted  and are ever more apathetic to our fellow drivers.  I think they should bring back the bench seats.  We could all slow down a bit and get back to a simpler time and place and enjoy our loved ones more.  What do you think?